server database naming issues

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    For the second time my hosts have crashed my server and deleted the server database/index/ files while updating it.

    i believe the issue is caused by the naming convention used for the database files as I cannot upload the missing files and all my backups that i have downloaded via FTP have these files missing also

    Is it possible to give the database files a name before the extension?
    eg .data becomes sm.data etc so that back ups with any FTP software is possible and hosts dont accidentally delete the files because their backup software cant handle these files either